2018 Homemade Tear Drop Camper

Are you a normal-sized person with a desire to see the majesty of our great nation? Are you shorter than 6'3" and love camping? Do you yearn to become one with the natural world and the surprisingly large amount of space you take up?

This beauty of a camper has all the anemones . . . aubergines. . . AMENITIES you could ever want in a pint-sized package perfect for your next playtime pilgrimage! The only thing missing from this beauty is space for yours truly! 

Let's start the list: 

Electric hookup: yes
Like-New Tires : yes
A/C: yes
Foam mattress : yes
Cedar interior: yes
Easy leveling legs: yes
2" hitch : yes 
Brake lights: yes 
Turn lights: yes
Running lights: yes
Storage rack: yes
Rear kitchenette: yes
Title, VIN, plates: yes
Waterproof: yes
Room for a 6'3" 200lb man with size 12 feet: NO

I hope you can understand my distress when we purchased this and jazzed it up like a Hallmark movie prop only to find that I can't fit in this darn thing. Feets too big, body too long, I was feeling like the ramblin' road rejected my request for recumbency. 

This is everything you need as long as you are not a giant. Or orc, they're pretty big too. Maybe a troll, a troll might fit. You could camp under a bridge to avoid parking tolls. 

I'll add some measurements shortly. Sorry, I wasn't calling you "Shortly."